How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize