Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
