Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize
