I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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