Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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