Sry I called you an 8
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
A bitchslap is in order.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
