Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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