That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Randomize
