Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
