From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
4 words: hood of his car
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
