Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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