ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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