i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
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