After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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