I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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