Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
