the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
