I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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