He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I still have a little drunk in my system
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
