Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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