they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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