Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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