he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
It's blow job season.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
