he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I have post one night stand depression
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
