I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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