you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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