I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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