I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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