she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize