Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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