btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
