For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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