She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
