were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
