Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
he shaved USA in his pubs
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.