I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize