Church boner. Awkwardddd
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
