I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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