goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
