i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize