he wants to bone in the snuggie
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
