and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
