I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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