return my video game
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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