Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
