exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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