I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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