watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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