my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
