Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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