You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Randomize
