You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
