TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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